what is next?

i believe everything have its own time and fate.

sometime you might desire on something very much but you can't own it on that time.

but when you almost give up on it, it will appear in your hand suddenly and easily.

what you can say?

thanks god?

it's depend.

i don't really believe in god but seems like everything have their own timing and planning for you.

sometime i thought i am handling my life.

sometime i thought i am doing my choice.

but sometime i felt that everything that i did was a plan of someone.

i will feel that i just a little play doll for that someone.

and be honestly,

i hate that feel.

it keep happen again and again in my life.

i try to against but natural power is out of my expectation.

sometime and something,

be a fool is better be a genius.

at least, fool will never know the feel of pain.

they just innocent and no need worry so much.

everything have its plan.

you never can against it because it is out of human power.

maybe i can say it is side effect of homo but i think it is my original characteristic and thinking.

... complicate feeling now.